Listen to Me Read Caught with your Pants DownStockings.  What man isn’t a fool for stockings?  The sight of a beautiful woman with long, sexy legs, wearing thigh high stockings and stilettos.  Mmmm, even if you’re more the hot girl in a t-shirt type, if a gorgeous woman in stockings asks you to give it up, you’ll be undoing that velcro fly to release that ten inch pole in no time!

Do you find it hard to resist a woman in stockings?

Do you find it hard to resist a woman in stockings?

If I Could Only Flag Her Down

Of course, if she outright asked you to do the tube snake boogie, you’d gladly comply.  Trouble is, she’s not asking.  While it’s true that every girl is crazy about a sharp dressed man, look at yourself.  You aren’t exactly Mr. GQ.  You look more like a dirty dog wearing cheap sunglasses!  Some women might like a rough boy to toy with now and then, but she isn’t going to want to be saddled with a punk ass boyfriend.

If you’re to even stand a chance with this upscale, pearl necklace, champagne and diamonds kind of woman, you need to get a shower, go to a hairdresser, and buy some new clothes.  After all, you just got paid, so you can spare a few dollars to spruce yourself up and turn yourself into the master of sparks!

Gimme All Your Lovin’

Don’t let those long, sexy stocking-clad legs and those penthouse eyes leave you in a world of swirl.  Just be bold and brave, tell yourself  “I’m bad… I’m nationwide!  Besides,  she loves my automobile, that should count for something!”

Now that you’re feeling like a Sheik  instead of the old man that you are, go right on up to her and ask her if she wants to crawl into your sleeping bag with you.  Oh wait!  Scratch that!   My head’s in Mississippi or something, because she’s a heartbreaker, a cocktease who’s only going to tease and torment you until you reach for that belt buckle and then she’ll  head back to that groovie little hippie pad of hers and leave you buck nekkid, wanting more!

Waitin’ for the Bus

Not to salt lick those wounds or anything, but ya know what?  It’s really best to move on down the line, head for the hills.  I seem to recall I’ve got a friend who lives on the hill… she won’t do it, but her sister will.  And if that doesn’t work?

You can always get going down to Mexico.  Have you heard?  There’s this little Mexican Blackbird down there that will have you delirious in no time!  She’s got legs… and she knows how to use them!

Or so I’ve heard.

There you have it, pets… how to be a fool for stockings!

Until next time,